Annie L., It sounds to me like you are doing the mom thing just right :)
An image that comes to mind is a flower garden during a terrible rain; mud splattered everywhere, leaves and flowers alike bent over and covered in wet dirt, the ground a mushy mess of disturbed earth. And then, the sun comes back out, everything stands upright and the mess turns into a rightfully beautiful sight. Yet, it was a flower garden all along.
Both the messy rainy mud and the clean, clear sunshine are necessary for it to even be a beautiful flower garden.
I think it’s ok to be bent down and dirty under the rain just as it’s ok to stand up straight and look beautiful in the sunshine :)